


Strong with the Force

by Fangirltbh



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Episode XI, F/M, Fluffy, ForceSkype, Happily Ever After?, Post-Star Wars: The Last Jedi, Reylo - Freeform, Spoilers, canon virgin! Ben, some smut (not that good. Still trying so hey)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-01
Updated: 2018-06-05
Packaged: 2019-02-26 00:25:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 20
Words: 16,219
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13224348
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fangirltbh/pseuds/Fangirltbh
Summary: Rey has left Ben Solo behind on the planet of Crait and is hiding with the Resistance on yet another hidden base. Except was her decision of refusing him the right one or will she go back to him and finally accept the offer?





	1. Chapter 1

Some nights were colder than others. There were days when she couldn't stand the though of not seeing him. 

She would go to sleep alone, waiting, anxious. 

When she did see him, the conversations were usually the same. Always the same fight. But nights were her favorite. 

If he was sleeping, she would crawl into bed with him, feeling his warmth. She thought if she slept with him like this, he might return to the Light. He did this to her as well. 

They never quite touched. A good inch kept them from giving in but, oh was it tempting. 

They think about each other a lot, even in their dreams. Why didn't she say yes? This distance is killing her. 

But she has the Resistance that she needs to look out for. They had hope in her since she was strong with the Force.

"You're the only one that can defeat Kylo Ren," they kept telling her. 

She never told them about her connection and when she does get caught speaking to him, she says she's just muttering to herself. No one can find out about them.   
The Resistance were laying low on a grassy, hilly planet near the Outer Rim. There was a town about a kilometer away, but they kept their noses away from the Resistance. They could understand why. 

A new mission begun, to send out ships, one at a time, to find those that would and could help against the First Order. Enemy number one: Kylo Ren.

During the meetings that settled these mission debates, Rey kept silent. If she didn't keep biting the inside of her cheek, she would've done something she regretted. Except now her cheeks are raw from all the chewing. 

She can't let this happen. If he dies, she'll lose a piece of herself. If she loses him...no she can't think about that. Not now. Not ever. 

-

"You look worried. You have since Poe sent out the mission."

Rey turned to find the retired Princess giving her a watchful eye. 

"I-"

She held up a hand. "I know this is about my son."

"How'd you-"

"It's my son. I know everything."

Rey smiled, wiping away the sudden tears she felt. 

"I also know there's something between you two that I don't understand. Don't let it go to waste."

She patted her shoulder, boarding the ship. 

Rey spun around. "Leia!"

She looked over her shoulder at the top of the ramp. 

Rey wanted to say "thank you" but instead what came out was, "May the Force be with you."

Leia smiled before the ramp went up. If Rey knew that would be the last time she'd see her, she might've said something different. But once the shuttle lifted off, it was already too late. 

-

A painful tremor ran through the Force. One of pain and acceptance.   
No way...

She turned around and Ben was standing with his back to her. 

"Ben?"

She took slow steps, trying to understand what just happened, why she felt what she felt. He felt it too, didn't he?

"It's all my fault," he breathed out. There was a sob mixed in there. He was crying.

"What are you talking about?"

She was close enough that she could touch his shoulder if she wanted to. Just inches away...

He lifted his head to answer. "I...gave the order...to destroy any ships that didn't pass our codes and I..." He licked and bit his top lip, bowing his head down again.  
"I killed my own mother."

He was broken. That's the last thing he wanted. 

"Ben, you didn't mean to-" she choked out.

"And I did!" He turned her. "I killed both of my parents, Rey!"

She reached out for him. "Please let me help you." Her chin trembled as the words spilled out. It was like that day he killed Snoke all over again. But worse. 

He backed away, getting far away from her touch. 

"Leave me alone."

"No I'm not going to leave you alone. You're hurting. You need me."

His body eased as he spoke. "But you don't want me."

Her heart started racing. He knows his way with words doesn't he? 

"I didn't say that."

He walked back up to her. "But it's true isn't it? If it weren't, you'd be here with me and I-"

"I _am_ here with you."

He shook his head, pursing his lips. "No. Not really. If you were here with me, I probably-"

She took a step forward, the sorrowful tears turning into angry ones.

"Probably what?"

He took a step back, the torment contorting his face. "It doesn't matter anymore. It's over," he murmured with a quivering lip.

She looked down and he was gone. 

She's the only one who can save him now. This has to work.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey looks for someone to speak to yet no one wants to listen...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I almost forgot to post but I didn't. Every Sunday!

Poe became the next General. Maybe with him in charge, she can talk to him about Ben. Leia, might not have been able to coerce everyone because that was her son but Poe has no personal connections so it could work. He had a meeting discussing the tragedy of losing Leia and how they will move forward. The new resolve was definitely more violent and terrifying than what was originally planned. 

A girl named Rose stood, arguing that this form of aggression was wrong, that we will lose more people than what we have that way.

"The First Order has taken out too many of us. I've gotten word that the new Supreme Leader is Kylo Ren and if that is true, we are all doomed."

"You're wrong Poe! The more we fight with hatred, the more people we lose. We need save people with conviction and compassion."

Poe pinched the bridge of his nose. Maybe his new job isn't doing to well for him. 

"We'll discuss this later."

Rey looked over at Rose, and made her way over to her.

"Hey, Rose, um I like what you said. I believe in it."

"Oh. Hey you're the girl who fought along side Finn right?"

Rey looked down bashfully. "Um, yeah. I guess you could say that."

Rose smiled. "If it wasn't for you, he wouldn't be here today. Kylo Ren could've killed you both."

Rose leaned in closer to her and spoke in a whisper. "You also saved _his_ life. Not everyone has good intentions. Watch where you step."

She walked away, leaving Rey to her thoughts. 

-

Thank goodness for the Force that night. She was having so much doubt and was being flooded with her own thoughts, she needed some comfort. Except, once again, Ben was asleep before her. She crawled into the space next to him, feeling his heat. The Resistance was so small now that she got her own bunker to herself. It was just them two in here. 

He breathing pretty heavily. Good, he's sleeping. She left that one inch as usual but for some reason, tonight, it didn't feel right. 

What if she just... Her hand touched his back. He was so warm. She slid it over his waist, pressing her forehead to his back. If only it was like this all the time.   
No more anything keeping them apart. Why didn't she say yes?! 

He turned around, wrapping his arm around her and pulling her closer. 

She gasped, trying to keep a distance. Her heart was pounding loud enough for him to hear.

"Is this alright?"

"N-no it's fine. I just didn't know you were awake."

"I'm always awake when you do this."

"Oh."

She covered her mouth with her hands as his arms enveloped her into him. She couldn't stand the embarrassment. If he didn't like it, he would've told her or jumped away but he stayed...

"Ben?"

He was fast asleep. Maybe the next time they speak, she can apologize for his mother properly. No, he wouldn't want to talk about it. She just wants to see him again. Even though he's holding her right now, it still isn't enough. She wants him. 

-

"Poe, I was wondering if I could talk to you?"

He was walking fast and Rey had to run to keep up. 

"Make it quick."

"Maybe Rose is right. Maybe we're going about this the wrong way."

"That was quick." He started walking away again.

"But you didn't hear what I have to say."

He waved his hand aimlessly in the air. "I don't need to. It's all going to be the same discussion. Pointless."

"Poe we can end this if you'd listen."

He stopped her in her tracks.

"Do you know something about the enemy I don't? 'Cause then I'm all ears."

Only that she has a strong connection to the most powerful man in the galaxy right now.

"No," she answered. 

"Okay then. This discussion is over. Corporal.."

Every day that goes by that she didn't take his hand, every day there is more doubt in her decision.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey is scared and confused and just as helpless as she was before she joined.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been rewriting a lot to make this story better... Anyways see you guys next Sunday and enjoy this quick chapter!

"They're not listening to anything I have to say. I thought if I came back they would, but it's just the same. Destroying the First Order is their top priority, especially you."

She was sitting on a bench across from Ben, alone in one of the grand white halls of their station. No one really came this way. There was nothing but storage and scraps. Some place a scavenger would like to hide. 

"And I hate my role in all this."

He got up, walking over and sitting beside her. 

"What's that?"

She wiped her nose. "I have the Force," she shrugged. "That gives me the power to destroy you. But I can't..."

She dropped her head.

"Why can't you do that?"

She shook her head. 

"Look at me, Rey. Why can't you do that?" He asked softly.

She held her head up and faced him, answering painfully through gritted teeth. "You know why."

"I do know why, but I want to hear you say it."

Cocky bastard. He smirked.

Ben took off his gloves to reach a hand up to her cheek, wiping away the tears with his thumbs. She grabbed his wrists, scooting closer to him. 

"Because of how I feel."

He leaned in closer and she could feel his breath on her chest and his want for her roaming in his body just as much as hers. Her skin was crawling with sudden heat. She needed him to touch her. 

"Rey, there you are. I've been looking everywhere for you."

She spun around, dropping her hands and leaving Ben's arms. Finn was striding up to her.

What was that just now? 

 

She convinced herself to talk to Finn about the problem. If she could've spoken to him alone, that would've been better but Rose clung to him like glue. 

"Can I talk to you? Alone?"

"Of course."

He looked around before shoving her into an empty conference room. 

Rose wasn't close so she had some time.

"Do you trust me?"

"Of course."

She grabbed his shoulders. "I need you to really trust me. I can't let this get messed up."

He stared deeply into her eyes and nodded. "Yes, I do."

She backed away, holding her arms.   
She didn't think she could face him so she didn't. 

"I can't fight this fight anymore."

"Rey, you're one our best fighters. The way you took out all those TIEs on Crait-"

"I know. I know."

He was flustered. She had to calm him down somehow. 

"I did that because you guys needed help. I don't think you need that help anymore."

"What're you saying?"

He grabbed her shoulder, turning her around. She gasped out. 

"I'm saying I'm not going to be like one of them! If we just keep trying to kill each other, then we're no better than the First Order!"

He dropped his hand and she stepped back. "They're killing more of us off than we are to them."

She shook her head. "It's not worth it. We need to stop fighting."

"Are you serious? What about all they've done to us? What about the torture we've all gone through? Especially you Rey? Kylo Ren has taken you away and tortured you who knows how many times-"

"No he hasn't!"

Her fists were clenched and her eyes squeezed shut. When she opened them, Finn had the most shocked and awful expression. 

"Rey..."

She can't explain it to him now, not when he's looking at her like that.

"I can't do this right now!" She exclaimed as she ran out. He called out to her as she escaped all the frustration.

-

She's tried to talk to everyone who'd listen. No one gets it. 

Her friends aren't the enemies. The war is just... It's too much for anyone to handle now but she has a lead and a new outlook so why-? 

Rey couldn't fight her feelings of irritation any longer. She didn't want to talk to anyone and get even angrier than she was. 

When she got to her room, her hands were hot, pumping blood too quickly.  
She caught the first thing that glimmered in her eye. That damn lightsaber.   
She picked up her half, glaring at the piece with daggers before chucking it at the wall.

There was no point to any of this. She's just as meaningless here as she was on Jakku. Except, when Leia was around, she cared what Rey had to say.

Her knees buckled, shaking so much from the adrenaline. Something is going on inside her... 

It's all too much. The Resistance, the First Order, the Force. She can't take anymore of it. She wished she never had the Force.   
Maybe she should've just left the droid alone or sold him to Unkar Plutt when she had the chance. She wouldn't be here right now.

"Rey."

That soft voice made her look up quickly. 

"Ben," she cried out. He kneeled in front of her but she didn't take any time to fall into his arms, hiding her face in his chest.   
She was trembling, a sniffling mess as he stroked her hair to calm her down. It was helping but she had to remember it wasn't real. 

She grabbed his arm as she muffled words into his chest. 

"I'm so scared, Ben. I'm so terrified."

He nodded, pressing his hand to the back of her neck as he hushed her. 

He knows what she's talking about. He's the only one that ever will. 

If she doesn't do something and quick, she will lose him. The Resistance grows stronger with every ship that goes out and makes it. It's burning brighter and she's getting more afraid. 

He stayed with her, getting into bed slowly after her, keeping her close to him, and continuously stroking her hair until she fell asleep. 

 

It was still dark out when she woke and he was gone, but that was to be expected. 

Actually... If no one would listen to her in the Resistance, maybe someone in the First Order will, more specifically, the Supreme Leader. He will listen, she's sure of it. When they first spoke after she left him on Crait, it was about her coming back, nothing about the real fight.

She can end this war and the answer has been right under her nose.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey finds a spark of hope and also a little green monster with feelings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I remembered! And I don't know how many chapters there will be but I am writing the ending and I do think it's coming together :)   
> Enjoy!

Today was a major lead for the Resistance. They finally got ahold of an alliance member on the Outer Rim. They should be coming in with more weapons and battleships too. 

Rey just wanted to make it back to her room after the announcement so she could talk to Ben. Anything would be better than hearing people talk about killing other people. There was no good or bad side, was there?

"Hey Rey, hold up."

She stopped, biting her lip in annoyance.   
"Yes?"

She blinked a few times, seeing both Poe and Finn before her. 

"You okay? Look, we both wanted to apologize for the other day."

"No, it's fine. Don't worry about it." Her lips twitched a quick smile. 

"No really. I should've listened. I should've been open. I can listen now," Finn said genuinely. 

There were so many people bustling around and talking and making noise. It was blotting out her thoughts. 

"I'm sorry, maybe another time."

She started scurrying away but her arm was caught. 

"Wait, Rey. I am sorry. Really. It's just been hard ever since I've become general...since we lost Leia. But I am trying to hear everyone, especially you."  
He bit his lip and smiled. "You're a good fighter."

Rey could hear something in his tone that made her smile too. "Thank you."

Her fingers instinctively tucked a lock of hair behind her ears. She glanced over her shoulder one last time with a grin. So there is some hope.

Her cheeks hurt from smiling so much. Good. There was something.

Oh wait. 

She was running as fast as she could. Her door was right in front of her. 

It was too late. Her heels skid to a stop, almost making her topple over from the sudden halt. 

"It seems you've been pretty busy."

She jumped at his voice. 

Rey glanced over her shoulder and Ben was standing there with his arms folded. Not good.

Her hand flew to her chest. 

"Kriff, Ben you scared me."

He didn't respond, just kept staring.   
She turned her back to him to avoid his gaze. His next words were a strike of lightning in the dark.

"What do you do when I'm gone?"

"It's none of your business, is it?" She started heading for her door.

An unwarranted blush started to grow on her cheeks as she passed him by. 

"Do you _want_ the other men that flatter you?" 

How did he know... It shouldn't be a surprise that he does but it still bothers her. 

But back to what he said, how could he think of that her when she only thinks of him? 

Maybe he saw her and Poe.. Or he heard her thoughts...

Finn is just a friend and Poe is nice but Ben is...everything.

"I didn't want to talk about this. I wanted to ask something of you."

He nodded, facing away in contempt. 

"I don't like where this is going."

She folded her arms, looking directly into his eyes. "You always do this. Why can't we just talk without you getting upset?"

"If I remember right, the first time this Bond happened, you tried to shoot at me."

Her shoulders lowered from their defensive position. 

"What did you want to talk about?"

She sighed, rubbing her arms shamefully. "You're Supreme Leader now. Can't you do anything to stop this? Or change the course-"

"I've already spoken to you about this."  
He stomped away from her. 

"No. I've asked you to come back. Not about this."

He rubbed his face with his gloved hands. 

"No one will be happy. If I do that, there will be those who will be upset and those that will be happy. It's a constant cycle. And the Resistance will rise up and make a new First Order. It never changes. Both sides need to quit but they can't because there needs to be order and-"

"-balance."

She knew he was right. The Resistance is going down that very path. They're no better than the bad guys. 

"But the worst part is, I don't care about making the First Order, or the Resistance, or even the galaxy happy. All I care about is making you happy."

Their eyes connected and she swallowed.  
He reached out a hand and she took it this time with no hesitation, stepping up to him. 

"Please come to me. I want you to be with me again."

"Now this is a conversation we've had."  
She dropped her hand away, walking to the other side of the room.

"Why can't you understand I'm trying, Rey? I'm trying so hard so that you will come back to me."

"You can't do that with all this mess."

His fists clenched. "Why do you even stay? No one trusts you anymore."

"That's not true!" She whipped around.   
"Then why do you stay here? What have you contributed to the Resistance? Hope?"

She bit the inside of her cheek, keeping her head down. There's really nothing she has done.

"Or you're hitting it off with new General and that's the real reason you can't leave," he muttered with much disgust.  
Her body started shaking from his random accusation. "What-no!" 

"It's true though, isn't it? You can't hide anything from me. You haven't done anything here to help. Except maybe tempt men."

"Are you serious? How dare you! I can't stand you. I don't even know why I think I can speak to you!"

He exhaled aggressively.

"You're being so unreasonable. Except this isn't the first time so I'm not surprised."

His eyes darted to her. _"What?"_

"Would you have said yes? If you were in my position, would you have said yes to the offer you gave me?"

"Yes," he firmly stated.

"Why?" She hissed. 

"Because I don't have expectations, Rey!"

She sucked in a breath at his raised voice. He never yells at her like that. 

"That's pretty hard to believe considering you have so many of me."

"I don't."

She threw her hands up in confusion. "That-that doesn't make any sense! Why would you ask me that then-?"

"I thought you felt the same!"

His jaw set as he averted his eyes away. Her heart moved in her chest once she realized what he said.

"Ben-"

"No, don't say anything. You've refused me several times. I don't need to go through that again. "

He turned his back to her. 

"Ben wait!"

"Don't act like I'm leaving forever. This damn Force Bond doesn't let us hide."  
He left her alone in her dark space. If she could make him come back or will herself to him she would, but she can't. Rey wanted to tell him that she already told him that she can't fulfill her duties here because of her feelings for him.

It hurts more and more when she thinks of how they could be together now. She has been thinking of the offer lately. If he didn't want to rule everything, if he didn't want the power and it was just them, then maybe...she might've said yes. 

But he's such an ass.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey loses and regains hope (literally and metaphorically)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I won't be posting next Sunday so I might post on Friday because I'm going to take the weekend to do something that will change my future! Thanks for reading guys!

"We can talk now."

Finn got up from his seat. "Oh sure thing."

Rey noticed Rose share an odd glance with him. 

They veered around a corner and they stopped. 

"What was that?"

"What was what?"

She made the face they made. "That."

"Oh. Just lunch plans."

"You make lunch plans with that face?"

"Oh yeah.... Hey-hey Poe," he made the same strange face. And Poe gave an awkward thumbs-up. 

"See lunch plans?"

"Why haven't you ever made that face towards me?"

"I-I will. I could if you want me to."

She squinted her eyes at him and clicked her tongue. "Are you hiding something from me?"

Finn hesitated. "Uh. No no. Definitely not. Why would you think that?"

She rolled her eyes and walked away.

"Rey, wait come on! I believe in you! May the Force be with you!"

 

Poe called for both Rose and Rey to meet him up in the conference room. It seemed they had a lot in common when it came to ship parts and bypassing things. Except Rose has something on her and she's hiding it with Finn of all people. She didn't like where this friendship was going. 

"Rey, good. I found you. Where's Rose?"

"I don't know. I wanted to ask you about her."

"What? We got more intel on the First Order and-"

_Click!_

No, not now!

She glanced over Poe's shoulder and gasped. 

"What? What's wrong?"

Her eyes darted between the men. She wasn't planning on seeing him now. 

"Why are you keeping this a secret?"  
He got closer until he stood practically next to Poe. 

"Ah, you hate it don't you? Having to see me everyday."

That's not it. And she can't answer because Poe is right here.

"Rey. Come on. You with me still?"  
His hand waved in her face and shook her shoulder. 

She blinked, returning her attention to the General. 

"Sorry. Got lost in thought."

Ben stepped back. "It doesn't matter what I do. I won't ever be enough for you."

 

Rey wanted to talk to him about so many things. There was that weird thing going on with Finn and Rose, and the plans of the Resistance, and them. She wanted to talk about them the most. 

Rey didn't know the next time she'd see him but she knew she had to admit her feelings. His insecurity was only furthering them apart. 

The only thing she could do by herself was practice with her staff. The saber was broken so she had to make do. 

Rey left the hangar. No one was really allowed to leave without clearance but she does not care. 

It was nice going outside. The wind was nice and the night sky was just dark enough. Stars adorned the sky like blazing jewels. It was beautiful. 

There was a presence nearby, calling her. She knew not to venture too far but couldn't help it. 

If she wants to learn as much as she can from the Force, she has to follow her feelings.

Rey started running to the source.   
There was a grove of trees right over the first hill she came upon. A lake glimmered nearby, catching her eye. 

It was quiet when she came up to it. Quiet and still. Why was it so...?

"I knew you'd find me Rey."

She spun around, holding up her staff.  
"Easy there."

"Luke?" She sighed, lowering her weapon.

"That's right."

"You were the one calling me out here? Why?"

Luke walked up to the water, staring at the sky through the reflection. 

"I need your help. Desperately."

Rey swung her staff onto her shoulder and came to his side.

"What kind of help?"

"Ben. You were right about him. He's teetering. He needs that push, Rey."

She shook her head, stepping away.

"No. I've already done that. It's up to him-"

"He needs someone to believe in him Rey. I realized that too late. Han. Me. Leia gave up when she shouldn't have," he turned to her quickly. "Don't let them die in vain. Save Ben Solo. Do what I couldn't."

She bit her lip and shut her eyes. It's all so much and scary. The power he wields is something she couldn't control now. 

"Luke, I don't think-"

Rey raised her head but he was gone. 

She could be just as wrong as Luke was in thinking he could do it himself. This time, she should hold her hand out to him, bring him home.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reylo For the Win

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Early post but short post! And just pure Reylo so enjoy!

He was sitting across from her, shirtless again. His eyes were on the wall, or a wall. 

"Ben I'm sorry for earlier."

His eyes moved from the wall to the floor as he shook his head lightly. 

"Can we at least talk about what's going on? There's a fight outside and in here."  
He took a deep breath and swallowed. 

Is he really going to stay silent like this the entire time?

"What did you expect me to do? Look like a crazy person and let the whole Resistance know we have something going on?"

Her face was heating up from the pent up anger she was fighting back. Her skin started to pinch from the nails that began to dig.

"No, I didn't think you were so embarrassed by me," he muttered.

She stood up, taking a few steps closer to him. "I'm not, Ben. I have a lot of people suspicious of me already and that would've made it worse."

More silent tears slipped down his cheeks. Her words were taking no effect and it was starting to break her down.

"Please Ben, I'm so tired of fighting you. If they found out, they would find a way to hurt you."

He finally lifted his head, blinking slowly with a broken gaze. It reminded her of the face he gave when she left him behind on Crait. She shuddered at the wave of guilt.

Rey sat next to him, keeping an inch between them. 

The Resistance would try to find a way to get to him through her, she knows that for sure. It wouldn't be wise to let others know. Her hand grabbed his stiff fist.

"Ben. I don't want you to question where I stand with you."

He stood up, resting his hands on his hips while shaking his head. He finally opened his mouth.

"How can I not? You..." He paused as he tried to hold back his true feelings. They betrayed him yet again, letting out a cracked sound before he started speaking. 

"You're happier without me."

She jumped up, rushing to his side. "No! Ben, look at me."

She grabbed his face, forcing him to look at her. Tears were spilling over her thumbs. 

"I'm never going to give up on you-"

He pushed away, stepping back from her until he was against the wall.

"Don't act like I've never heard that one before. You and everyone else in my pitiful family," he sneered. 

"Ben-"

" _Just don't,_ " he warned. 

The sharpness in his tone didn't scare her. She stood her ground as she always did.

"My offer still stands too. Just let me _in._ " 

She wasn't sure if he was even listening at that point but she needed him to understand that she is on his side.  
Rey stepped up to him, reaching her fingers out to him. He let his hands be grabbed by her much smaller ones.

"Then you need to let me do the same."

Her eyes stayed on their mingling hands.  
He's right. They're both scared and alone, fighting on opposite sides. None of this has ever been easy.

He rested his forehead against hers. His chest pressed into hers, radiating heat.

The Force was as it should be. The Light and Darkness were together and entwined. The last time it was like this was when they fought together.

It was relaxing, almost, with how smoothly it was flowing between them. 

Rey could feel her heart starting to race the more she pressed herself into him. 

This would be a good time to tell him her feelings. 

"Ben?"

"Yes?"

"I...I'm-"

A pounding made her jump. 

"Rey, we gotta go!"

"I'll be there."

She glanced back up at his sorrowful face. 

"I'll see you again soon."

Rey took a reluctant step back, keeping her hand in his until the Force cut them off. The air was unfamiliar and cold around her fingers.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey is faced with much doubt, betrayal, and-

_Finn is hiding something. Finn is hiding something with Rose,_ was all she was thinking as she came into the new strategy debate. 

They were talking about the new ships the First Order was pulling up. They were bigger and faster than before, with longer-lasting fuel tanks. What is Ben thinking? She thought he wanted to end this an yet he's still fighting... 

If she would've stayed, it would've been obvious they were _together_ and maybe this wouldn't be happening. It doesn't matter. Right now, she needs to get the suspicion off her back. Were Finn and Rose the base of all this? She didn't know. 

Once she gets that lightened up, she needs to get Ben onboard with her. Rey can't stand another day without him here, by her side. 

But the Resistance...

Rey has the Force, something no one else here has. She should have some influence and she's going to let the General know that very soon.

Poe was commissioning the new bomber fleet to go out in a couple hours. 

Once he was done talking, she hopped out of her seat, running up to him.

"Poe!" She called out.

"Rey, good timing. We have a new status for the Falcon. We need you and Chewie to fly the Falcon to Kylo's ship-"

"No."

He froze. "What?"

She was standing tall and firm. "I'm not going to do anything you say until you listen to me."

"We don't have time for this!"

She used the Force, taking his blaster from his belt and holding it up to him nonchalantly. Nobody was really paying attention to them as they filed out. Good.   
There was something boiling in her and for some reason, she kinda liked it. 

Poe nodded quickly as he glanced back at her.

"I have the Force. I can do more things than you think. You'd be wise to listen to me."

His chest was heaving as he put his hands up. "Alright. Alright. What do you want?"

She lowered the blaster a bit.

"Is there any other way you can stop all this?"

"No way! We've come so far! What happened to the talk we had the other day?"

"Do you even know the weakness of the First Order? Or are you just going in blindly?"

Poe gave a smug expression, yanking the blaster out of her hands. "Listen, you may be a good fighter but I don't want you questioning my methods. We're done here."

He brushed past her.

Her lip twitched and she couldn't take it.. "I'm not killing Kylo Ren."

"What?"

She turned around with balled fists.

"You can't make me do anything."

"He's a monster! He deserves everything that's coming to him!"

Tears burned down her cheeks. This isn't over. 

"He's Leia's son. Are you really going to kill the last thing that links to her?"

Poe turned his back to her. "Bloodline doesn't matter here. Didn't Kylo make that clear when he killed his own father? I'm not giving him leeway because of his lineage. It's just all the more reason to take him out."

She was alone and crumpled. Everything that was going up, is falling downhill fast. Ben is upset, Poe is upset, Finn must be confused, and Rose doesn't trust her.

She came back to help not destroy. Destroy and kill. And Ben... How is this going to work out now?

-

"Rey, you okay?"

She dazed out again, thinking of the mess she's making. 

"Yeah..."

Finn raised an eyebrow. 

"No," she mumbled. "Can I ask you something?"

"Anything."

She folded her hands in her lap. "Were you afraid to lose Rose?"

"I'm not sure what you mean."

She got out of her seat, wandering away. "Like are your feelings...deep...for her?"

He pursed his lips and stared at the floor. "I honestly don't know that yet. I'm still wondering that myself. I do care about her, definitely."

Rey started wringing her wrists.

"Do you miss her when she's not around?"

He shrugged, shaking his head. He stood and placed a hand on her arm. 

"Is something going on? Do you have a boyfriend _now_? A cute boyfriend?"

How did he know?

He started laughing. Oh. She started chuckling nervously. 

"You can tell me anything."

"I know."

She hugged him, hating how much she's kept from him. 

"Poe is expecting everyone in the hangar soon. I'm gonna head over there now. See you later."

She turned her back to him once he veered around the corner. 

_Click_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woohoo! Kinda love and hate cliffhangers. Trust me this won't be the last.  
>  I hope you guys know what that "click" means ;)   
> So I had a totally sh*tty week but at least I remembered to post. So there's that.   
> See you next weekend!


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (Refer to the chorus of Hot in Here by Nelly for this chapter)

_Click_.

The air was suddenly humid and steamy, making kinda hard to breath. Water was nearby. It was falling like rain. Even though she couldn't see it, the feeling was still there. Where is she? 

She turned around once more and there he was. Completely nude. 

Her mouth dropped and he was just as shocked as she was. 

"Can you put on towel or something?! Oh my gosh!"

"I'm in the shower! It's not like I was expecting you!"

At first, she covered her mouth but couldn't stop staring. Then she did the mistake of looking down. 

"Oh Maker! I looked! Oh Force!"

She covered her eyes.

"Rey-"

"No, shut up! I'm not looking! I'll just face over here until it's over!"

This was a nightmare. She was trying so hard not to look and she did. 

"Rey."

Why is he so calm about this?!

"What're you feeling?"

His voice was right at her ear.

"Panicked," she replied. 

She felt his hands hovering over her shoulders. A chill ran through her until she leaned back into his hands. This felt right, him touching her. 

"What do you feel?" He asked again in her hair. 

She had to take several breaths until she relaxed, finally hearing him. Her heart was still pounding against her chest but she finally could think. 

Her body eased in his hands. "I feel your wet hands on my shoulders. The heat of the water. Steam filling my lungs. Water soaking into my clothes."

"Interesting," he huffed out on her neck. His lips partially brushed her bare neck as he spoke, sending electricity down her spine.

She kept her eyes closed as he slid his hands down her arms, entwining his fingers around hers and wrapping both their arms around her waist. This brought her closer to him, pressing her back into his dripping chest. His wet hair tickled her neck as droplets fell down onto her collarbone. He rested his head on her shoulder, making her lean back even further against him. 

How is this happening? How is the Force this strong between them?

"Ben," she breathed.

She turned around, still pressed to him. Oh my gosh, she could _feel_ him!

"Kiss me."

One hand stayed on his chest and the other went to his silky wet hair. 

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

He placed a hand on her neck, keeping his other arm locked around her waist.   
She closed her eyes as he leaned in.   
His lips were taking an eternity to reach hers but she was not going to push him. She swore she could see the Bond physically trying to connect. Her heart was pounding in her throat. Through all the heat and humidity, she could feel his breath in her mouth. 

She needs him here, really here. 

These little trysts aren't cutting it anymore. 

"Rey, where are you?"

Seriously?! 

Someone was coming. They both looked up to the sound. 

"I don't want to let you go," he whined.

She gave him a small smile before kissing his cheek, "We'll see each other again."

She stepped back and she was out. The air wasn't hot anymore. The sound of the shower was gone. Her clothes weren't wet or disheveled as expected when she tried fixing them. 

"Where the hell have you been? We're going to start soon."

Poe started walking away the same way he came. 

"I said I wasn't going to do it. I'm not going to kill him."

Especially not after that. 

She licked her lips. 

"It's not about that. We have something else to talk about."

Rey was angry. So much anger has been building in her lately and she has been letting it flow. This, all of this, was the main cause.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey y'all, I though I'd thrown in some fun since I only post once a week to this very sad fic.   
> Just needs some TLC!   
> See you next week folks!


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey starts doubting everyone and tells an accidental lie while Ben tells a very truthful truth(*wink wink*)

They're getting a bigger alliance. They'll be able to take the First Order and kill him for sure, with or without her. She knows the dates they are planning their full attack, the ultimate war. If she could somehow coerce Ben to come here that day, they can leave all this madness. 

She is being selfish but she has a good reason. She wants to save the man she loves. 

Isn't that what Rose wants too? And yet when she tried to talk to her, she got a retaliation she did not expect from such a small person. If there's any hope, it's not here. 

"Ben."

She opened her eyes to him standing over her, watching her. 

She stood up, reaching her arms around him.  
He held her back, exhaling heavily into her hair. Something was off... 

"What's wrong?"

He shook his head, keeping her head on his shoulder so she couldn't see his face. "First Order crap. Don't worry about it."

"Ben," she insisted. Is he hiding stuff from her too? What's going on?

Why is she the last one to be told everything? Why can't anybody trust her?

She was pulled back, seeing his eyes right in front of hers. 

"Calm down. Stop overthinking everything."

She was breathing rapidly and her heart was hammering in her chest. She got riled up over a few words he said. And he wasn't insulting her or anything. Why is this happening?

She hid back in his arms.

"Are you okay, sweetheart?" 

There were so many things bothering her, how could she say yes? 

"It's just... If you could talk to them and they'd listen, would you come?"

"Rey, they're not going to."

"But would you? For me?"

His eyes peered down at her pleading face. "Of course. I'd do anything for you."

"Then...could you do that? I want to see you again. For real."

He stared at her, trying to decide. His arms, curled around her, bringing her closer. 

"Yes, I'll come. I'll come for you, sweetheart."

 He's never lied to her. He's really going to be here with her. 

"I promise I won't let them do anything to you," she said. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh boy oh boy oh boy.   
> I hope you all are having fun!   
> It’s going downhill so fast!


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for missing updating for two weeks in a row but life does get in the way. Hope you guys are enjoying this little fic!

The alliance was rolling in with their bombers and flights every few hours to not be tagged. Rey couldn't stand to watch but there wasn't really much else to do. She lost her saber. She lost her teacher. And she's pretty sure she's losing her friends. 

Everyday, she wished Leia was here. Couldn't Luke use the Force to pop up? He was making sure to stay out of it all as usual.

She sent Ben her coordinates and he said to give him two days from this planet's time zone. The first day was going by so slowly for her. 

The new battalion was coming and with much anxiety, Rey had to watch and welcome it.

Finn grabbed her shoulder, catching her by much surprise. She shook her head, trying to calm herself down.

"Are you alright? You seem pretty on edge today."  
She's been biting her nails off, hoping that her plan of Ben will work in their favor. 

"Yeah. I'm just hoping it all pays off."

"It will. Don't worry."

He had know idea but she didn't say anything. She never wants to see that distorted look of horror on his face again.

He rubbed her back. "Kylo Ren will go down once and for all."

Her stomach dropped but she still nodded, biting the inside of her cheek to keep her mouth shut.    
Rose came up to them but Rey couldn't hear what they were saying. Her mind was fried. 

_What is she doing?_

 

Rey went back to her room in a panic. Everyone is talking about "burning down the First Order" and she can't stand it.

If she just goes to bed, maybe she can sleep away this tightness in her chest. Her head felt light from all these horrible thoughts. 

She started getting ready for bed when she felt it and she smiled when she did. He's the only one that can really understand and calm her down. 

"I've-what's wrong?"

His eyes were wide and he was covering his mouth. 

Why is he-? Is he blushing? 

She just took off her shirt and it was hanging at the end of her arms.

Wait, has he never...seen a woman? 

Being a man of his status with those looks, she thought for sure he would have... 

Or maybe it's because he's never seen her. That's probably it. 

She dropped her shirt and stepped up to him.  
"Oh come on, Supreme Leader. Don't tell me this isn't old news to you."

He swallowed reaching behind for something. His hand was flat, probably against a wall, as he turned around. 

She knows she's going to see him tomorrow but they may never get this time again with the way the Resistance is behaving. 

"I-I'm sorry. I was going to go to bed and then-"

She stepped up to him, pressing herself into his back. 

"Yeah, me too."

His breath quickened, feeling her against him.

"Rey. Don't."

She stepped back in a huff, walking around until she could see his face. 

"Why not?"

His eyes were shut. He's serious. 

"Because we're supposed to be enemies."

Rey slid in front of him, grabbing his face with her hands. His cheeks were hot under her palms.   
His hands went after hers immediately to take them away. 

"And we aren't, are we?"

His eyes opened just a slit as he shook his head only slightly.

 That was enough. 

Her arm hooked around the back of his neck, pulling him down to her. 

Her mouth fit to his immediately. He was so warm and gentle, pressing his lips to hers just as eagerly.

_No,_ she thought, _we're lovers_.

She bit his lower lip and he whimpered, pushing back into her. His tongue easily gained access into her mouth, making her dizzy with more want.   
His hands dropped to her waist, squeezing her as close as he could to his chest while their lips explored. 

His leg scooted in between hers, propping her up on his thigh. 

She couldn't breathe. Between the nipping and pushing and thrusting, her mouth couldn't get enough air. 

She tore herself away just to hear him groan in annoyance.

Her heart was beating so fast, it made her feel like a little girl with this silly crush. 

Ben dipped his head into her neck and placed his hands high above her on the wall.

"You're going to be the death of me," he exhaled. 

She smiled, kissing his hair. 

"Ben?"

"Yes, love?”

"Tomorrow, when you come here, let's just run away," she whispered. 

He lifted his head and dropped his arms to take up her hands in his.

"What?"

She shook her head. "I've been thinking about your offer and why I refused. I was going to yes but I didn't want to rule anything. I just wanted you. If we could just run away and leave everything behind-"

She held his face, petting his hair. 

When Rey looked at Ben, she had to cut herself off. He wasn't looking at her. His eyes were distant and wet. 

"What is it?"

"Would you really want to be with me forever? And..."

He brought a hand up to his mouth again. She figured that's what he does when he gets flustered. 

"And what?"

They disconnected before he could answer. _And what?!_  

Now it's going to be bothering her what else he was going to say. But she can ask him tomorrow.

_You'll stand by my side._  

If only she saw what he did on Ach-To, but now she thinks she is starting too. 


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey gets caught red-handed

She was going from the hangar to the hills outside, waiting for him. 

Once she was going to go back outside, she was stopped by Rose. Not again. 

"Hey Rey! What've you been up to? I've noticed you've been coming in and out of the hangar all day."

If this girl knew, she'd ruin everything.

"I'm waiting for the next fleet to come in."

Rose put her hands on her hips, squinting her eyes at Rey in disbelief. 

"The last of them came in this morning. Everyone knows that."

"Well-just in case."

She whipped out a taser. "I know you're lying. Everyone knows you've been keeping secrets. Is it going to hurt Finn if he finds out?"

"I-I-"

"You hesitated."

She jutted her hand forward, aiming that thing right for Rey's chest. 

Rey grabbed her arm, swinging underneath and waving her hand behind her head. 

"Sorry about that. You gave me no choice."

Rey dragged Rose to the corner of the hangar, away from everything else. She should be okay here. 

Right as she stood up, she saw a flit of light peep through. It's him. 

She ran out immediately. 

Should she walk fast or run? She kinda did both.  
He hopped out of his ship as fast as he could. She was already up to him when he turned around. All he could do was open his arms and take her in. He picked her up in his big arms, sighing at the feeling. 

It's real. He's real. Through the Bond there was this air to it that made it feel real but wasn't quite right. 

This was so real, it made her head spin. 

"I'm never leaving your side again," she said.

"Good."

She could practically hear the smile in his voice.   
She pulled back to really look at him. Her fingers brushed his scarred cheek as he pulled her close. His cape was wrapping around her in the wind. 

"Rey, I-"

"Shut up." 

Her hands grabbed his face, yanking him down to her lips. 

But before she could kiss him properly, bright lights flashed on them. 

 Rey jumped out of her skin, extending an arm out in front of Ben to protect him. 

All they could see were blasters with lights blinding them, no faces yet.

"Kylo Ren, you are enemy number one! War criminal! Put your hands up!"

She didn't tell them. No one would try to listen when she asked and if she did, no one could've believed her. 

"Poe, leave him alone!"

"Rey, if I knew this is what you had in mind, yeah, I guess I should've listened more."

She didn't like the way he said that. She noticed Finn behind one of the blasters pointing at them. 

"You can't do this!"

"Rey you look just as bad as he does, don't make it worse for yourself."

Ben already had the cuffs on and was being escorted inside.

"No!"

He strode past her, giving her a thoughtful glance.

"Ben! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" She screamed until it hurt. 

She started running after him but was caught by someone.

"Rey! Rey, look at me! He's a murderer! Don't you remember that? You don't know that man in there."

"Neither do you!"

Finn was desperate and angry, trying to shake sense into her but it was already there. 

"Finn!"

"He'll destroy us!"

She yanked her arms free of him, stepping back. Tears flew to her cheeks as she shook her head. 

"Rey?"

Rey took more steps back, afraid of what may happen if she said something wrong but it was too late for that.

His eyes progressively widened. 

She ran past him. 

"No Rey!"

A few guards tried to catch her but she used a couple hits and few Force tricks to get past them.  
   
Ben was several feet ahead of her.

"Ben!"

Glares followed him as he went. And after they were done with him, their eyes shifted to her. So many judgmental looks. 

She caught up to him, grabbing his arm. 

"Ben, please believe me. Please believe me, I'm sorry."

She kept running a little to keep up with him and the guards. 

"I know. It's okay."

She was in hysterics, hiccuping and trying to catch her breath.

"No, I didn't think-I didn't think they'd do this to you."

"It's fine."

How is he so calm?

Her body was exhausted and couldn't keep up anymore.

"I'll make everything right. I'll see you again."

They turned the corner. She covered her face with her hands, falling to the floor. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late post again. But I am still taking care of this little fic so please keep liking and reading because it helps :)


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey lays everything on the table in front of everyone in the worst way.

He was to have a trial in the morning and have his verdict declared by the next morning. 

She wasn't allowed to go to his cell until tomorrow. 

There were only a couple places to put him. They just locked him in an empty tool room with a guard outside. 

He could escape so easily, but he wasn't for her sake. He shouldn't still be on her side.  
   
Her eyes burned into her pillow. Nothing more would come out. 

"Rey."

She gasped, facing him, but quickly falling back. 

"I know you didn't mean it. I told you it wouldn't work."

"But what about in the morning? They might believe it."

He looked away. "I can only do so much."

She nodded, feeling a headache coming on. "I'll see you tomorrow then."

She turned her back to him. If she kept looking at him, she would burst again. 

"Don't you trust me?"

The odds did not seem to be in their favor. He has a plan in mind, doesn't he? She didn't want to ask. Her mind was so filled of betrayal to both sides. 

 She sat up, wiping away at her cheeks. "I trust you."

-

There will be hell to pay if they touch him. He doesn't deserve any of it. How could her friends do this to her? She never thought in a million years this would happen. It's all so messed up.   
They were having this trial with all the Resistance. The new friends weren't allowed in this. They held it in the biggest conference room they had. 

Rey and Finn were requested to stand next to each other in the front. 

It was time for it to start. Ben walked in with a guard on either side of him. He still had the cuffs on. If he really wanted to, he could just leave but he was being nice. 

Everyone hushed once he walked and stood at his post.

"Ben," she whispered. He looked up at her, locking eyes. Even though she was on the other side of the room, he still heard her. 

"Alright, let's get this started. Supreme Leader Kylo Ren, birth name, Ben Solo, is enemy number one. He has devastated, tortured and killed the lives of millions. He personally tortured me, practically killed Finn, and tortured Rey. We're lucky to be here."

Poe's attention turned to Rey for a split second before returning to Ben. 

Her eyes flew up to Ben and he was mad. He wasn't looking at her, no, his target was Poe.  
   
"Kylo Ren, you killed your own father, attempted to kill your uncle and mother. I can't believe you're still alive right now. Finn, would you like to say anything that could change the verdict?"

He stepped up. 

"He's a pretty terrifying guy. I have to say, when I saw him on Crait, all I wanted to do was kill him. He's a monster. He's taken Rey away for the longest, I can't imagine her stories."

She can only say good things and she will. 

"Alright. Rey?"

She stepped up, ready to lay everything out. No. She has to keep the Bond a secret. 

"Believe it or not, he's never hurt me. We all do things out of duty and that's what he's done in the best way he could. When he killed Snoke, we fought side by side. He's not who you think he is, if you'd just listen to him. He's just like us.” 

She gave him a bashful smile. Rey turned back to see if she convinced anyone. 

Poe's jaw was dropped. So was Finn's.

"I don't believe this. Did he brainwash you?"

"No! I'm not weak."

Poe shook his head. "No, no you're not..."

"She fell in love with Kylo Ren!” 

Rose stood up in the crowd and made her way to the front. 

"I can tell. She's wants to save him. You can't save a man like _him_."

There was a lot of quiet murmuring. 

Poe had wide and fearful eyes. "Is this true?"

Rey couldn't take it anymore.

"No I did not fall in love with Kylo Ren! He is not Kylo Ren. The man you knew is not the same man standing before you. He’s Ben Solo. That's the man I fell in love with!"

If only she could run to him and kiss him. He wanted to do the same thing. 

Poe was baffled. 

"I knew it! I told you Finn! She's been helping Kylo Ren behind our back. Rose found out earlier and you knocked her out. I saw you fraternizing with the enemy!"

"I wasn't fraternizing with the enemy!"

"You sure as hell were locking lips!"

"I was not! And he's not the enemy."

He shook his head. "Of course not. I don't know, maybe we should ask him. Do you think you're the enemy?"

Ben was not amused. 

"Because I'm Supreme Leader, I've realized how hard it is to make everyone happy. The Resistance, First Order, Rey... I can't take back what I did. It's done. I can't forgive what I've done either. I was asked by Rey to come here and negotiate the end of this war."

There was silence.

Poe piped up, folding his arms. 

"If you aren't lying, could this actually work?"

Ben closed his eyes in dismay. "I'd like to say it would but I'm not so sure myself. The next person under me is General Hux. He has almost as much say as I do and is not easily swayed."

"Huh."

Was Poe believing him? Was anyone believing him?

"Nice story. Take him away. You'll be dealt with in the morning."

Rey stiffened. "What? No!" 

The crowds started riling up again and standing on their feet, yelling at him. She started towards Ben  but Finn grabbed her arm. 

"Rey."

It's too late. She chose him.

"I'm sorry," she slipped out. He let her go in defeat. 

Rey ran to him. 

"Ben!"

She reached out to him but a guard stopped her from touching him. 

"Ben, I'll come to you."

"It's fine."

He started leaving.

"I do. Love you, I mean."

He looked over his shoulder and winked. "I know."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Omg no joke, I’m posting on time. I’m very much trying (especially with this chapter) and I am my own worst critic... anyways I hope y’all enjoy this chapter.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey says goodbye and hello there...but not for the last time.

There were several questions to be asked but Poe said he'd interrogate her alone in the morning. 

She didn't want to speak to Poe or Finn. She doesn't think Finn will ever speak to her again anyways. She declared her love for Ben in front of everybody. 

Would Rose agree with her since they both loved another person and just wanted to be together? Maybe she'd think it wrong since he's the Supreme Leader of the First Order. 

She was waiting and waiting for Finn to come out of his 'cell'. Only one person could be in there at a time.

What could they be talking about? The last confrontation they had was...bad. There wasn't any yelling going on in there so maybe that's a good sign? 

She was making herself dizzy from all this pacing. She rooted herself on the bench in the hall. 

She can't explain this to Finn. Ever since the beginning, it's been hard. 

The door opened and she hopped to her feet.   
"Finn."

He kept his eyes down as he strode up to her. "He really cares about you."

"Wait."

His eyes finally met hers. "Good luck, Rey.”

That sounded more like a goodbye. 

He walked past her but she couldn't let go like this. 

"Finn?"

He turned around, letting her throw her arms around him. "Thank you. For everything."

He gave her a tight squeeze back before stepping away. "See you around."

She smiled, nodding in agreement. 

Once he was gone, she faced the door.

"Ben," she breathed. The guard unlocked the door once she came up to it. 

He was sitting in the only chair in the room until she came in. 

"Ben."

"Rey."

He crushed her to his chest. 

She couldn't stop the grin that spread  on her cheeks. He wasn't upset.

 He tried like he said he would but they still didn't care. 

"Let's go," she whispered.

He pulled back. 

"Do you have a plan?"

She opened her mouth then shut it.

"That's what I thought."

"I do! It's just a work in progress right now."  
He raised an eyebrow. 

"Okay I don't have a plan."

"And that's why I'm here."

She giggled. 

He pecked a quick kiss to her lips, making her even more lightheaded. 

"Hm," he brought his gloved hand to his chin until he had it. "Okay, here's the idea..."

-

The light went out in the room. Any second now...

The guard unlocked the door and strode in. Ben reached out his hand, knocking him out. Too easy.  
   
Rey noticed his blaster on his belt and took it. She didn't have a weapon so why not?

"Let's go!"

He started running towards the hangar but she caught his hand. 

"It'll be obvious if we go straight over there. Let's go another way."

"Right, good idea."

All he said to her was 'Turn off the lights, take out the guard, and get out.' 

Really Ben? You call that a plan? 

They were going toward the bunkers.

She heard voices around the corner and immediately pushed Ben against the wall.

"Come here often?" He joshed.

"Shh-shut up!" She sputtered out. 

Her body was pinned to his until the coast was clear. 

"Okay let's go!"

"Ah, I don't know I kinda like this."

Her eyes widened before she pushed away with a smirk. 

"Come on."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After this chapter will be the beginning of the end/chaos :)


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Force is a bored. And the two kids are confused.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am dragging this out on purpose *evil laughter in the background*   
> Okay but seriously I know I’m not he best but the kudos I’ve been getting lately for this baby is really helpful. Thanks guys :)

They snuck over to her bunker. 

"Get inside."

He let her go inside first, slipping in after her. 

"Okay, we can spend a few minutes hopping from place to place under here so they can't pin us. We have about an hour before they find out."

Rey was listening but not looking at him. Her eyes were on her split saber. 

It stayed on that dresser, haunting her since the last day they were face to face. 

She picked up one piece and he picked up the other. 

"Do you really think everything will be alright?"  
His hand grazed the side of her arm, sliding up and down. 

"Do you remember one of the first things I said to you?"

He set the broken piece back on the dresser. She was turning hers in her hands.

"Where's the droid?"  
"No."

"You're my guest?"

"No."

"I can take whatever I wa-"

"No! No-okay. No. Why is your memory so-no, okay... I said don't be afraid. Don't be afraid."  
She let out a breath she was holding back. He took her broken half out of her hands, setting it down next to his. 

_"Don't be afraid."_  

He pressed his forehead to hers, placing both his hands on either side of her neck. 

"I won't be afraid."

She tilted her head up and kissed him. Her hands grabbed his around her neck, rubbing her skinny fingers over his. Her body was pushing into him, almost demandingly. He seemed almost...reluctant still. 

"I can't do this."

He stepped back, letting her go. His back faced her as he covered his mouth. 

"Why not?"

"I don't know. It's you. I don't want to ruin this for you. And besides I don't think this is the right time."

Something was telling her this would be the only time and she had a bad feeling about it. Does he feel it too?

"They know, Rey. All of the First Order knows," he turned to her with a grim expression. 

"What are you talking about?" The Bond?   
He sat on her bed, talking off his gloves to run anxious fingers through his hair. 

"Hux needed another reason to how Snoke was killed. He was too sharp on it. I told him everything. About you, about us. He was disgusted. That's why I came when I did. Like I said, he has just as much power as I do. I don't know what he's going to do."

And he came in a First Order ship so they can track him... And if not that, Finn told her they can track through lightspeed and she's sure he travelled through lightspeed. 

Rey was trembling and she didn't even know it.

"So did you bring them here?"

He rubbed his palms on his thighs. 

"No. That's why I said we have about an hour. The Resistance and the First Order will be looking for us. That's when all hell will break loose."

It'll be the ultimate war...and they're right in the middle.

That's why she has this awful feeling of this being the only time. They're not going to survive this.   
She knew what she had to do.

Rey threw of her belts and took off the wrappings over her shirt and on her arms.

When her focus shifted back to Ben, he was still lost in thought about all the chaos that was going to happen. She's literally undressing in front of him, how is he not seeing this?

"Ben."

His eyes met hers as she slid her top up and over her head. 

"Whaaaat are you doing?"

"What does it look like?"

"Something you shouldn't be doing."

He shot up quickly spinning on his heels to face away from her.

"Ben. Can't you feel it?"

The desperation because of their limited odds was very high. He has to know that.   
He hesitantly nodded. 

"Can you please face me?"

He inched his turn around, keeping his eyes sealed shut. This again? 

He has seen her shirtless like this so why is he like this?

Wait, has he really never... 

She grabbed her arms in shame. She shouldn't have pushed him like that. 

"I'm sorry. I didn't know you hadn't-that you never-"

Her arm was yanked forward, surprising her.   
His eyes were open as he brought her to his chest. 

"What-"

He leaned down and held her face with one hand. His lips brushed hers until she choked back a whimper. 

Ben Solo is a very bold man. 

Rey got on her tiptoes, finally pressing her mouth to his. 

This kiss was more exciting and luxurious than the one over the Bond.

He pulled away for a second and they were breathing heavily, staring into each other's eyes.

_More_ filled their thoughts immediately. 

They won't be able turn back from this. 


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> These kids take an anatomy lesson.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So longer chapter for lack of me being able to write stuff like this :D

"I don't think this is going to work out. Even if we wanted to keep him alive, I think it'll blow up in our face somehow."

Finn hung his head. "When I spoke to him, he reminded me of myself not too long ago. He's a man, Poe."

Poe shook his head with a laugh. "Weren't you the one that wanted to go charging at him on Crait?"

Finn stood, walking over to his side. "Well... That was before I had a decent conversation with him."

Poe unfolded then folded his arms again. "He is a Force user, like Rey. This is a dangerous situation, having them _both_ here."

Finn furrowed his brow. "Are you saying Rey would betray us or hurt us or something? Because she wouldn't!"

Poe waved his hand in the air. "I'm thinking of all possible outcomes... I don't know if she's always been like this but, she's been acting strange. Like she would look off into the distance for a long time or I would hear her talking to herself. And then out of nowhere, she no longer wanted to kill Kylo."

-

She laid back and he quickly followed, kissing her fully. 

Her hands grabbed onto his broad shoulders, keeping him close to her. 

His skin was hot against hers but it was also just as comforting. She wouldn't want to do this with anyone else. 

He pressed down into her as he moved from her mouth to her neck. 

How does he know all her weak points? Her hand flew to his hair when he nipped at her collarbone.

"Ah, Ben," she moaned. 

-

"I mean I've already been telling you to keep an eye on her."

"I still don't know why."

Poe nodded, walking in a circle. "Rose caught on. That's why she confronted Rey before he came. And Rey attacking her just confirms my beliefs. I think Rey is a spy for the First Order."  
-  
His hands slid down her body, giving her chills.   
"Are you sure about this?"

Her chest was rising and falling rapidly and her heart was racing out of control. 

He was breathing just as hard. 

"Yes. Yes. Keep going. I want to feel you."

She reached her hand up to his scarred cheek. Her thumb pressed into it until his hand caught her wrist. 

"I want to feel you too," he mumbled against her palm. 

-

Finn stood there with his mouth agape, finally processing what Poe said. 

"No. No way she would ever do that."

"Finn, she fell in love with the Supreme Leader. How else could she have done that unless she was a spy?"

He paced the room, trying to get to the same conclusion as Poe. 

"I just can't see that happening in a million years. Rey is my friend. She wouldn't destroy fighters and help us like she did on Crait if she was."

"That might've been to hide her cover."

"Maybe we should go and ask her then. Get the truth from the source."

Finn started walking to her bunker with Poe on his heels.

-

He pushed into her and she didn't think of how good it'd feel to finally have him.

Their connection was stronger than ever. She could practically see the Force physically come together when they did. There was that _click_ in the Force. This was right. This is where they were meant to be. 

The heat that had been growing from each meeting was melting her from the inside out.   
He started thrusting at just the right pace and she couldn't stop her hips from responding. 

His eyes were not leaving her and it made her feel almost bashful. She covered her face with her arms. 

Rey felt his hands skim up her skin to her wrists, pulling her hands away from her face. Ben held her wrists above her head with one hand and grabbed her hip with the other. 

"Look at me."

She bit her lip, listening to his command. A wave of pleasure ran through her as she kept her focus on him. 

He leaned down to her, pressing his cheek into her neck. 

"You feel so good to me," he moaned out. They were both on the edge.

"Mmph," she responded. Her fingers slipped out of his grasp to rub the back of his neck and grab at his shoulder. 

"Don't stop," she gasped out.

Sweat built on her brow, as his chest brushed hers and their hot breath mingled together.

Her hand stayed in his hair, tugging at the thick locks. 

-

They were almost there. Just one more walkway to go down-

Poe grabbed his shoulder, bringing them both to a halt.

"Wait, Finn. I don't think this is a good idea."

"But you are the one making the accusations."

"I know. But being General, I have to think of the best and worst situations. Rey's had a long day. She's probably in her room, really upset over all this."

Finn glanced down the walkway where her bunker was. She must be. 

"Alright."

Poe patted his back. "We'll ask her in the morning when she's ready."

-

He filled her to the brim with his release and she couldn't help but give in as well. They stayed like that, holding each other. 

They both started catching their breath, letting their hearts rest a bit. 

Ben lifted his head, pressing trembling lips to hers. He kissed her slowly until breaking away and letting out a breath against her neck. This is how it should’ve been from the beginning. Just them lost in each other with the Force. 

He raised himself once more to kiss her forehead before resting his forehead on hers. 

"I love you," he sighed.

"I love you too."

A slight smirk twitched at his lips. Is something bothering him...? 

He rolled off of her, staying by her side on the bed. 

Ben reached over to pull the blanket that was scrunched into the wall over them. 

"You seriously sleep with this _thing_?" He snarked. 

"Yes. It's better than nothing."

He rolled his eyes, draping a possessive arm over her. She scooted up next to him, placing a small hand onto his large chest. 

"I have soft and thick blankets with large, fluffy pillows."

"That's because you're spoiled, Ben."

His fingertips ran back and forth down her spine.   
"You'll be spoiled too," he whispered. 

She flicked her eyes up. He was on his elbow, already leaning down to kiss her. 

He's already an expert at this, at working his lips. 

If she gives in, they'll do it again and she might fall asleep on him. That'd be sad and embarrassing. 

"Ben, Ben," she cut through kisses. "Ben, I'm exhausted."

He laid back down in defeat. "Fine. Go to sleep."

"Thank you."

She turned her back to him and closed her eyes. Oh yeah, she remembered that he had something else to say. But her eyes were closing and her body was too heavy to ask.

His arm reached back over her and for the first time in a long time, she felt like she could sleep with no interruption, no nightmares. 


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The kids move quickly and Rey stumbles a bit *wink wink*  
> Let’s finish this... well not yet.

"Rey. Rey, sweetheart. Wake up. We gotta go."

She barely opened her eyes. Her body just went into sleep mode a second ago. 

"How long have I been asleep?"

"I'm not sure. Let's go."

He threw her her shirt. 

She sat up, holding the blanket to her chest. 

Her vision was blurry but Ben was getting dressed quickly. 

"What's going on?"

"Remember that hour I told you about? It's gone. We have to leave. Now."

-

Poe had the recovered Rose and Finn by his side, while everyone else was asleep or on standby. 

"Maybe Finn is right Poe. You could be overthinking it. I mean, we don't know Rey."

"I know Rey. Why can't that be enough?"

"I'm sorry Finn but-"

Poe's gaze went over Finn's shoulder to see a red dot blinking. 

"No way."

He ran to it. Several ships were approaching out of lightspeed. 

"I knew it! They're here! Dispatch all units immediately!" He yelled into a comm. 

He turned to Finn and Rose.

"The First Order is here. Let's go!"

-

A large _boom_ was followed by a shake to the bunkers. 

Rey opened the door, stumbling out with Ben right behind her. 

"What was that?" 

"I don't know but it's not good."

Rey was still adjusting her clothes as she ran.  
Ben was going to put on his gloves and cape but felt the shake before he could. They ran out immediately. 

Rey kept tripping on herself. Maybe she should've stayed there and rested a bit longer. 

She felt Ben's hand on the small of her back.  
   
"You okay?"

She nodded.  

"Come on, my ship is right out there."

They were running into the mess. It's just as she thought. People were yelling and running. Sirens were going off. 

The hangar was open once they got there and all the fighters and bombers were gone. The fight has begun. Thank goodness she remembered the blaster she stole. There was a ground battle going on too between troopers and Resistance fighters.  
   
Explosions were going off all around. 

"Let's go."

She nodded. 

They went straight into the clearing together to get to his ship. 

"There they are!"

"Supreme Leader has the girl! Shoot her!"

"Kill him!"

His TIE blew up right in front of them, blowing them both back. 

Rey was flat on her back when she opened her eyes. Her ears were ringing and everything was blurry. 

Someone was calling to her.

_Ben. Where's Ben? Is he safe? Is he alright?_ was all that was on her mind as she sat up.

Someone grabbed her shoulder and she reflexively reached for the blaster that was next to her.

"It's just me."

He's okay!

She smiled, hugging her lover. Ben helped her up.  
"We have to get out of here!" He shouted over the fighting.

"I know a ship!"

She started running and he followed. It was in the woods so the First Order wouldn't see. The hangar couldn't fit it. 

"There it is!"

"Aw no. I'm not getting on that ship."

She placed her hands on her hips. "You can."

"I can't."

"You can."

"I can't."

"You can!"

"I can't!"

"You can!"

"I will! Jeez, act like I'm not going to get on..." He started muttering. She rolled her eyes, yet smiling that she won.

He went up the ramp slowly and was greeted with a defining roar.

She forgot! Rey ran up the ramp behind him.   
"Chewie! He's with me!"

She was too late.

Ben was enveloped in a overwhelming Wookie hug. 

Chewbacca was practically purring, petting his adopted nephew's hair. 

"Let's get out of here you guys."

They ran up the ramp.

"Rey get the guns, I can fly this thing."

She folded her arms.

"What? It's.... You think I don't know how to fly my father's ship?"

"How many years has it been?"

His face dropped. "A few."

She wasn't taking it.

"Okay, several, I can do it though. Just go to the guns."

She shook her head before turning around.

"Ah, Ben."

"Yeah?"

She grabbed his arm and got on her tiptoes to give him a quick kiss on the cheek. "Good luck."  
He turned to her, staring deeply into her eyes. They both closed their eyes, leaning in close...

Chewie roared, breaking them apart.

"Right!" They said in unison, running away from each other.

Rey sat in her chair, hoping he could do it. She could feel the engine rumble and they lifted up.

"You did it!"

"Not yet sweetheart."

He even remembered the headpiece. 

They had to get out of these trees and the atmosphere and then-

Someone was already shooting at them.  
It was a black Resistance ship.

Poe.

"What are you doing?! Fight back!"

"It's a Resistance fighter!"

"Rey, they're _ALL_ trying to kill us!"

He's right.

She targeted the x-wing and started shooting.

"Can you get us out of here?!"

"On it!"

He started moving, and they really started getting out of there.

He was dodging everyone like it was a child's game.

She started shooting at those following them.

"We have to get out of this atmosphere and then we're off to lightspeed.”

They were almost there. TIEs and X-wings were fighting and only a couple of them caught on that they were the rogue runaways yet couldn't decide if they should fight them or each other. 

"Rey?"

"Yes?"

"I got good news and bad news. What do you want first?"

"Good..?"

"I forgot we can be tracked through lightspeed so thank goodness that won't be happening because we don't have lightspeed.”

She threw off her headpiece and climbed back up, running into the cockpit. 

"That was fixed not too long ago..."

She checked the main hyperdrive port. It was disconnected, or more like cut loose.

This was done on purpose.

"They knew we'd take this ship. We don't have lightspeed. We're stuck."

She didn't have a plan other than running away with him.

Now what? Fight until they die?

No, they can't go out like this. Her plan was to save Ben from everything and she won't stop until that mission is complete.

The fight was worse once they got out of the atmosphere.

Bombers, TIEs, x-wings, Destroyers, and almost every ship in the arsenal from either sides were out here. 

This is it.

Ben and Rey shared a look of disbelief. 

"That's my main ship over there. Let's end this. Now."

"Really?"

"Yes." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys I almost forgot to post. But then I remembered :)  
> I’ve been having eye troubles so I hope to get that fixed soon and if it’s not, here’s a longerish chapter! Thanks guys!


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It is the beginning of the end. Can the kids not be awkward? No, that’s impossible.

They landed on a strip inside his ship. 

Chewie was going to protect the Falcon while they ended it.

Once they stepped out, they had blasters locked on them from every angle.

"It's the Supreme Leader."

"It's the girl! Shoot her!"

Ben pushed Rey behind him, stopping the blaster shots. 

"Who gave you those orders?!"

Everyone put their weapons down, stepping back.

"Who, dammit."

Rey grabbed his bare hand, rubbing her thumb on his wrist to calm him down. 

It worked but he was still pissed.

"General Hux, sir."

Ben smirked but not the way she liked. 

"Is Hux the Supreme Leader?"

No one answered. 

"If anyone sees Hux, he is to be executed immediately."

They left the strip to go to the bridge towards the elevator. 

"Does this bring back memories?"

She bit the inside of her cheek, feeling a blush start to bloom. 

Once they stepped off the elevator, he led her to a chair in front of a massive window. She held his hand all the way over and as they stood there.

They were just killing each other, without a cause it seemed. 

"This could've ended differently. Except I'm not the ruling type."

"I think you would've made a lovely empress," he teased. 

"No one should be ruled over. Everyone should have a choice, be free."

"Exactly why you should've stayed. You would've helped me think."

"No one would've listened," she chuckled sadly.

"You're right."

The elevator doors opened. She spun around quickly, holding up her hand.

The blaster shot was a good five feet away from Ben's back.

The pale man in the elevator stepped out laughing.

"No wonder you like her, Ren. She is a quick one."  
She was holding that blaster shot midair just like what he did earlier. 

Ben turned around and comprehended the situation immediately. He held up his hand and pushed hers down. He sent back the shot immediately.

"Rey, get behind me," he growled. 

"Ben!" She complained. She didn't like to seem helpless or useless in any situation.

"Rey." 

Okay. This is his fight. She listened and stood behind him. 

"A piece of trash and a confused child. What a delightful combination."

Rey saw Ben reach for his lightsaber on his hip. That was the last thing she did when she was with him; she clicked his saber back into his belt and prayed he stayed safe before she ran away to the waiting Falcon. Now she's here, watching his every move like they were in the throne room again. Well, they are but back then she had doubt. Now the doubt is filled with love and hope.

"I didn't ask you to issue the order."

"No but you did start such a unique uproar. Having a mysterious connection with a desert rat who is just strong enough to take out Snoke, his guards, and you? I knew you were lying. You come from filth and will always be."

He twisted the hilt of his saber in his hand. 

"Your words are meaningless. Just like you, Hux."

The ginger sneered, raising his blaster. 

A shot went off. Rey flinched, grabbing onto Ben tightly and squeezing her eyes shut. 

She opened her eyes and gasped. 

The redheaded man was on the floor. Ben was fine. 

Rey ran her eyes past the fallen man to the elevator doorway.

"Finn!"

She ran around Ben, running up to her friend and throwing her arms around him.

His arms were tight around her as sort of an apology.

She let go of him and smiled.

"How did you-“

"They're making their way up. If you want to get out of here without them noticing, you gotta go now."

Her mouth opened then closed when she felt an arm pull her back.

" _I'll_ take her. Thank you for the help but we can take it from here."

Rey rolled her eyes at his possessive attitude. He shouldn't be jealous. He's the only man that she'll ever look at differently. 

"You don't know their plans like I do. Poe changed it all. We have to go."

"Why should I trust you?"

"Ben! Finn! Let's just go!"

She pushed Ben's arm off her and glared at Finn as she stepped into the elevator.

They followed her in. 

Ben slid a hand around her waist.

This is going to be a long ride.


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The fight is over. Well. No. Not really.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for posting late but man do I love slow burns :)

They stopped a floor above the hangar but she could already hear the fighting below her. 

Rey took one step forward and was pushed down immediately.

"Stay down!"

Ben had one arm locked over her waist and the other on the back of Finn's head, keeping them both down.

The explosion was seconds later, bursting the hall into flames.  

Rey started coughing from the smoke that already started to greet them. 

The doors to the elevator were on fire. Where can they go?

Ben helped her up. Finn stood and brushed his jacket off. He took up his dropped blaster.

"This way," Ben said.

"That's the traitor! And the girl!"

Blasters started to go off behind them. 

The word didn't get around not to shoot at her?! 

They started running down the hall.

Ben stopped and pulled a piece of metal off the wall with the Force and shoved it back at them.

"Keep going!"

There was a utility closet and a ladder at the end of the hall. Everything must've been down the other way.

Rey started climbing down. That's where the ships were.

She waited for Finn and Ben to follow. 

"You!"

Rey whipped around.

Rose was charging at her with what looked like a stolen electrified staff from a stormtrooper. 

Rey reached behind her to where she shoved her blaster but it wasn't there. Where's the damn blaster?! 

Rose charged her and knocked her down. Rose kept Rey down with her knees. 

“I knew we couldn’t trust you!”

Rey cried out as the heat of the electric pike grew closer to her face. 

She heard Ben coming down the ladder. 

She used the Force to call his lightsaber to her again.

She used the back of the saber to hit her in the face, knocking her off. Rey got up and ignited the saber. 

"You are traitorous bantha fodder!"

Rey swung down, kicking her back.

"What the hell?!"

Ben and Finn were frozen.

"Guys! Don't stand there! Do something!"

Finn ran to Rose, holding her back.

Ben pulled out the blaster she had.

"Where'd you get that?"

"I picked it up after the explosion in the hall."

Makes sense. She must've dropped it there.

He tugged on her elbow.

"Come on. He can handle her."

Rose hadn't looked at Rey yet.

"Let's go."

She took his hand as they ran to the other side of the hangar. Her hold on his saber was tight as they veered around the corner.

"Oh, shit!"

Ben skidded to a stop, throwing his arm back to keep her against the wall.

"What?"

He shook his head, peering around the corner. 

"It's a madhouse."

It was so loud but her ears have been ringing all day from explosions she couldn't tell what was where.

"Ben. Let's just do it."

He nodded and kissed her forehead.

"I love you."

She smiled, squeezing his hand in hers.

"I know."

Ben turned around and she ignited his saber. 

Once they walked out from behind the wall, all the attention turned to them. The shouts were endless. 

No one stopped for them. They stared but kept killing. 

Ben shot his blaster while also redirecting other's shots. Rey was swinging the red saber to deflect oncoming shots from hitting them. 

It was almost in slow motion as they fought against everyone together.

Them against the Galaxy.

"Rey!"

Poe started walking towards her very quickly.

"I can't believe you didn't tell me you were working with the First Order the whole time."

"I wasn't." She raised the crackling red saber in defense.

He nodded. "I'm sure. But it's a shame it turned out like this."

He raised a blaster to her but a swinging fist met his jaw, making him fall onto his back.

"It's not a crime to fall in love you piece of shit."

She let out a heavy breath she was holding. 

Thank goodness Ben was on her side.

Rey turned off his saber and rushed to Poe's side.  
He was coming around, opening and closing his mouth and rubbing his cheek.

"I think your boyfriend broke my jaw."

"Poe, get out of here. Take away the fleet. Ben and I, we're leaving."

"Rey, we can't just let them rise up and-"

"We're killing each other off! Is this what the Resistance originally intended? Let it end, Poe. Let it go." He looked around, watching his allies and comrades kill and be killed.

He closed his eyes and laid back.

"Fine. You win. I'll call it off."

She stood up.

"Rey, I better not regret this."

She shook her head with a smile twitching at her lips. "You won't."

Poe pulled out a comm and started giving instructions to leave. 

"Ben."

He glanced over his shoulder to her.

She couldn't leave without knowing she tried.

It is finally going to end. Resistance fighters started to pull back, going back to their ships.  
He could tell. He lowered his blaster and turned to her, opening his arms.

She started to run to him until her world stopped.


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey won her fight but lost her battle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for being so late. Life gets in the way.

She started to run to him until her world stopped.

One last shot she didn't see coming finally got its target. His expression mirrored hers.

His eyes were wide and mouth agape. 

She couldn't tell if tears burned in his eyes as they did hers. But her blood was frozen, keeping her still as she watched him fall to the ground.

"Finally!"

The ginger man had a smug face and was leaning awkwardly on his side. 

Anger, pure hatred boiled down her frozen blood.

She picked up the blaster Ben dropped and shot at the disgusting man several times until he was down. 

Her tears spilled over as she dropped the weapon from her hands. 

"Ben!"

She ran to him, dropping to her knees at his side.

"No no no no."

This was all her fault. If only she saw that horrible man or felt him coming or something.

It shouldn't be him. He didn't deserve this.

"Ben, I'm sorry. I'll get you out of here. You'll be okay."

Her hands trembled as she brushed his cheek with her fingertips. 

He was pale and sweating.

His hand reached to her hair. "Shh, sweetheart. I need to-ah-I need to tell you something."

She grabbed his wrist, rubbing her cheek into his palm.

His body was convulsing into the pain.

"I-I wanted to...dammit. I wanted to start a family-with you."

She shook her head. "We will-"

His hand dropped to her stomach. 

Blood was seeping through his tunic onto the floor.   
He stopped moving.The color left his cheeks and lips. 

"You were right. I wish I could've lived that life you saw, walking with you in the Light."

"Ben, don't talk like this! We will! We'll  live our life and start a family."

Her hands grabbed at his shoulders. She glanced at his face and his eyes were shut. 

"No. No!"

She put her ear to his chest but couldn't hear anything.

Her hands went over his chest and started pushing in and out. 

"No. Ben Solo you can't do this to me! You can't leave me alone!"

His skin was cold when she touched it.

"Rey! Rey come on! The bomber fleet has this whole place rigged! We gotta go!"

"No."

Finn tried pulling her up but she fell on top of Ben, protecting him.

"I'm not leaving him!"

She clutched at his lifeless body. 

"Rey.."

He ran away, saving himself. Her thumb rubbed the scar she gave him. 

She pressed her forehead to his. Her tears slipped and patted against his cheeks.

Force, why did this happen? She can't save him. She can't do anything. She is a nobody from nowhere. This story was never meant to be hers. This happened because she got involved. 

All she can do now is stay with her lover's limp body and hope she sees him soon.

Rey could hear the explosions going off, getting closer and closer. 

She could see the flames burning brighter.  
At least she was meeting her end with him.

She brushed his hair back with her fingertips.  
   
"Thank you, Ben. For everything."

The heat overwhelmed her and the sound of glass shattered in her ear.

The smoke enveloped everything in its wake. 


	20. Chapter 20

4 years later...

He was staring out to the horizon. It's been four years since-no he can't think of it.

He heard someone coming up behind him.

The slightest gasp escaped their lips.

"You're back."

He nodded solemnly. No matter what anyone said, he still felt guilt for what happened.

"Come on, she's been expecting you."

She grabbed his hand and led him back to the school.

The academy was going smoothly with the occasional tantrums. But that's what they get for having a bunch of Force-sensitive kids and promoting both sides of the Force.

"Daddy!"

"Ah, Princess!"

The little blonde girl ran up to her father with open arms. He swung her up and pulled her into his chest as he stood.

"Has your teacher been giving you a hard time?"

The small girl shook her head with a giggle. 

"I'm right here you know. It is time for lunch."

"Oh."

He leaned down and kissed his bride. 

"Ew!"

His daughter hid her face in his shoulder. 

He smiled turning his attention back to his little girl.

"I brought you back something sweet."

"You did?”

"Mhm. Go to the dining area, I'll meet you there."

He let her go and she went running.

"You know you can't keep making her happy with sweets."

"I can try," he laughed.

She poked him in the ribs. 

"Hey!"

"You owe me too! You were gone for too long this time. And the Bond didn't connect us. I missed you."

He grabbed her into his arms.

"I'm sorry. I'll make it up to you tonight."

He leaned down to her lips but found air because she pulled back.

"You better Ben Solo."

She wasn't happy when she said his first and last name, he knew that. He's going to have to work tonight. 

Ben squeezed Rey close. "Okay but let me go fulfill my first promise."

 He jogged into the dining area where a bunch of little ones were stuffing their faces. 

His baby girl was like a blot of sunshine in the dark.

She reached out with grabby hands when she saw him.

"Where's this one from?"

"Corellia.”

He gave her the perfectly packaged sweet cake he found. She gasped at the swirling blue and red in it. 

"Yay!"

He watched with amusement as she opened it.   
Just watching her, brings back memories to the day he woke up.

Rey was sleeping next to his bedside. She said he'd been asleep for almost two weeks on a medically induced coma as they gave him blood and his body healed. But how he survived is a mystery. He felt himself die. Or so he thought. He could feel Light finally breaking through him and the Force extending past him in his body. 

He felt at peace.  

Rey said the ship blew up and she thought she was a goner too but when she woke up, they were both in a ball of metal. She used the Force to get them to the closest ship and break them out. The rest is history. 

They both should be dead and yet here he is, watching his little baby stuff her face with Corellian cake. 

She must've gotten the blonde from his grandfather. A more recessive gene but it's there.   
Maybe she'll grow out of it. But she is pretty darn cute. 

Poe and Ben came to an agreement and kept the First Order but the tyranny and fighting would end. Resistance fighters became a part of the new order and the stormtrooper program ended. Finn was Poe's secondhand man and babysat their daughter when they were both away. 

Rey had the idea to start a new academy that accepted both Light and Dark sides of the Force. Ben helped those that had Dark side tendencies as he did, reassuring them that it was okay to have. 

Once word was spread that a new Force-sensitive academy was opening, little kids from across the galaxy made their way here. 

The oldest was maybe twelve and the youngest was his four-year-old. 

Everything was going smoothly but every now and then he still had that gut feeling of shame and guilt. 

He felt eyes burning into his back. This feeling is something else...he hasn't felt since he was a teenager...

"Daddy, you're not leaving again right?"

Ben shook his head, facing her again. "No. I'm not going to leave."

He grabbed a napkin and wiped her cheek.

"Daddy!"

"Padmé you have stuff all over your face."

"Alright kids, come on."

A boy immediately got up and ran past Rey. Everyone got up and walked out. That was-

"Ben. Let's go."

Rey picked up Padmé onto her hip and reached for him with her other hand.

He took in the image. He never thought he'd have a child because of the fear his master gave him, that he'd torture and manipulate the child as he did to Ben. He didn't think someone would love and devote their life to him as Rey has. 

"Come on."

He took her hand and kissed her knuckles.

Padmé rested her head on Rey's shoulder and he stood, walking out with them. Once they were out of the dining area, their little one slid out of her mother's arms and ran after everyone else.

Rey turned to him immediately.

"Ben-"

He grabbed her face and crushed his mouth to hers.

"I'm sorry. I'm here. You'll never be alone."

"Neither will you," she breathed. 

Her hands flew to his hair and he grabbed her thigh, closing the gap between them. 

Her hand pressed to his chest as she pulled away.

"Welcome home, Ben."

Warmth always flooded through his body when she said that. And every time she said it, he knew he truly was. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for posting so late. This is the official ending. Thank you all for reading and following this story! It means a lot!

**Author's Note:**

> So this is just another story. I don't know if any post-TLJ fics are being made yet and this story has been on my mind for a while so enjoy :)  
> (I'll try to be constant with my posts so I guess I'll post every Sunday.)


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